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Old November 13th, 2003, 08:49 PM   #1
oldwardaggit
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It's been a while since I posted anything here of any length or any thing heart felt so I figured since all of you are my best friends, I would open up a little.

You see I have a cousin with a very bad problem. I hesitated to come out and say this because he is a very privet person but maybe all of you could give me some perspective.

My cousin's problem is this. He operates the faros wheel at the local car dealers while wearing spandex and being spanked with a big piece of Broccoli.
And he is pretty fussy about it too because it has to be fresh broccoli or spray painted green so it looks fresh.

The family has tried intervention. I even enrolled him into sports.
I signed him up for stump climbing but he kept over shooting the mark.

He gave that up and went back to the Faros wheel and it's not even a real faros wheel. It's an old bicycle with 4 missing spokes and little seats glued on to sit 8 Hershey kisses quite comfortably.

Honest, I wouldn't make this up.

It's not pretty to see a man with an 800 pound head sitting on a 100 pound body while in spandex sitting on the side of the road turning the back tire rim around and around while whistling the theme to the Andy Griffith show until he stops and says ( OK you free loaders, the ride is over. get the *&^% off barn daddies freaky faros wheel of pure passion.

I tried to have him come live with me but every time I would clean my toilet with that blue stuff, he would mistaken it for blueberry kool aid and damn near drink it all.

And what's worse is the fact that he has a name for his broccoli.
He calls it Carrot. Right out of the blue he will say ( Time to feed carrot ) then he runs over to the couch, lays the broccoli down, sits on it and farts. Then he yells, are you full yet.

.........................................................................................

Up date

Every thing is cool now, The sci fi channel changed their mind about Ron's Idea and now they are going to make a movie based on my cousin.
The only thing is, they are still going to call it Battlestar Galactica.

I say we all stop being so closed mined and give it a chance. I mean it's like being sucker punched in the back of the head by a big bag of turnips
..........................................................................................

For dvo47P

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Old November 13th, 2003, 09:11 PM   #2
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OWD

Which John are you asking?
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Old November 13th, 2003, 10:03 PM   #3
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John (dvo47p.)

I use to go off the deep end with some of my posts and he asked me to do another just like old times. I think I went right over the edge with this one though. lol

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Old November 14th, 2003, 05:28 AM   #4
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:laugh: OWD these stories are great. That is what is missing from CF.
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Old November 14th, 2003, 10:12 AM   #5
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Default Honest, I wouldn't make this up.

Quote:
Originally posted by oldwardaggit
John (dvo47p.) I use to go off the deep end with some of my posts and he asked me to do another just like old times. I think I went right over the edge with this one though. lol OWD
Oh, I'd say its safe to say that you have indeed,
gone right of the shallow end of the Gene pool.

Nice to know things are the same in Nova Scotia,
I shall never ever eat Broccoli again.

So how is that Pink Floyd thing doing?
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Old November 14th, 2003, 10:34 AM   #6
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ROTFL!
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Old November 14th, 2003, 11:30 AM   #7
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Thanks you all and I'm still waiting for pink floyd to send me some money. lol

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Old November 14th, 2003, 01:17 PM   #8
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OWD that was really...
....

really...


...strange.
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Old November 14th, 2003, 01:59 PM   #9
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Default IS IT MY TURN?, do I hear another story.....YES

Quote:
Originally posted by jewels
OWD that was really.......
really......strange.
No kidding!

Quote:
Originally posted by dvo47p
Thanks old buddy,now top it!
Mother taught me not to play with my food,
so now I shall endevor to do another story about
BATTLESTAR GALACTICA, or maybe the guy behind
RADIO GALACTICA! I heard he is sorta ODD.

Oh yeah, that Pink Floyd check is in the mail..........
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Old November 14th, 2003, 07:37 PM   #10
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I'm evenly odd or oddly even
My name is Shawn but to rime it should be Steven.

Yup, 25 years of waiting for a continuation
has taken it's tole with too much frustration. he he he

OLD BROKEN HEAD DAGGIT.
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Old November 14th, 2003, 10:48 PM   #11
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Keep it up, Twin!


Happy now, dvo? Oh, you want more?

Okay, Twin, moore, I mean, More. ''kicks self"

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Old November 14th, 2003, 11:09 PM   #12
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There once was a parrot and for a coat he used a live ferret.
He couldn't Bare it to wear it but was to selfish to share it.

He wore it once and bad luck had him tare it.
That's when the ferret bit the Parrot on the beak and the bird was so scared, he S**t him self.

The end.

Anyone see where I put my straight jacked? The crooked one doesn't fit me that well.

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