Originally Posted by julix

I have written some poems and wanted to get feedback from you all.....Let me know what you think



1)
As I sit alone
the house so quite
and calm
I wonder
who am I?
What do I need to do?
so many years of pretending
now it comes to this
one moment of truth
where I step in the spotlight
and see what I am made of



2)
Happiness an elusive dream
floating through my fingers
so often slipping away
like a whim
sometimes I try to chase it
or squeeze it to get it to stay
sometimes I hold on too tight
or shy away
sometimes I don't even try
at all, but then there is
no hope...and I am not ready to
live a life without hope
So I continue to dream


3)
I was outside; it was snowing
I was alone and it was so cold
So long ago it seemed.
The snow fell freely around me
The flakes were so beautiful and unique
So light and innocent, without a doubt.
How gently they floated down to the earth.
I reached out and tried to hold the memories
But like the snow flakes the memories melted away.


So what do you think?I had one of these published in the school newspaper
when I was fifteen.

Originally Posted by julix

1)
A soul that wanders through time
seeking to be filled
but finding emptiness
perhaps a mistake
no where to fit in
nothing that feels right
only a glimpse
of a parallel life
which can not exist
the torment is real
the searching continues
like a hungry beast
that needs to find food
for it's survival
Ravonous and wild
finding only desolation
with no way
to feel satisfied


2)
I long for the day
when the grief
has become quiet
when the giant
will sleep forever
but for now I see
I must continue on
try to do what I must
the pain, the hurt
so great there
is no relief
only struggle
only a journey
I am forced into
and afraid to take



3)
What cost must I pay?
What price to be released?
From a cell that has no bars
A prison with no key
many days of pushing away
the thoughts and emotions
only to have them return
with a vengence
overwhelming my mind
into silence

Originally Posted by Muffit

Way coolish Julix!! :thumbsup:

Originally Posted by julix

Here is my first poem not about grief and pain....




I will never forget
the way your eyes
cut through me
right down to
my very soul
a moment so filled
with a kind of
mesmorizing gaze
I have never experienced
before or since
piercing me like
the point of a knife
cutting through
the self-protecting
illusional armour
flesh then bone
leaving a lasting mark
never to fade
always having
a place deep
within me