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Martok The phenomenal Dark Exodus stories by Steve Dunlap!!!

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Old February 23rd, 2004, 02:38 PM   #1
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Default Dark Exodus Discussion Thread

Enjoy the story!

Updated by Muffit
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Old February 23rd, 2004, 04:55 PM   #2
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I've read this story - and it captures BSG very, very well. This Martok fella knows what he's doing! I recommend it to any BSG fan.



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Old February 23rd, 2004, 05:10 PM   #3
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This story ROCKS!! It captures, for me, the very essence of what I would love to see as a Continuation of the Battlestar Galactica story!!

Steve/Martok/generalchang, my hat's off to you and my hands are raised in applause!

Very well done!!

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Old February 25th, 2004, 08:02 PM   #4
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Yes, very well done!!! I can't wait to read more

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Old February 26th, 2004, 11:14 PM   #5
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Default Thank you all...

....Thank you, BST, and everyone else for allowing my story on this website. I hope that all other fans of Galactica on this site (regardless of where they stand) will enjoy this story as much as you, and Dawg, and Amberstar have.

Now, if I can just get my freakin' laptop screen fixed so I can start to work on my next Galactica Opus.

Thank you for the kind words, too. I feel justified in pouring my heart and soul into this tale for all fans of GALACTICA. And thank you for the honor of selecting "Dark Exodus" as the first story for this new forum. I am indeed truly honored.

Respectfully to all fans of Galactica,
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Old February 27th, 2004, 03:58 PM   #6
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Martok, you truly have a gift for writing, and for capturing the spirit and personalities of the TOS show. I can actually see Apollo and Starbuck standing in front of me when I read. And you have some truly inspired moments of inspirations as well - the chastisement in the hallway and Apollo's subsequent revelation of his true feelings when Starbuck is out of view - wow, truly great writing. I have seen real people faced with this same dilemma and you captured it marvelously.

I can't wait to read the rest! Will be back with more comments after I finish!
Thanks so much for sharing your gift with us!

Affectionately,
Muffit
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Old March 10th, 2004, 02:26 PM   #7
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Wow.

Wow.

I just finished Dark Exodus, and all I can think of is, wow.

This is not fanfic. This is every bit as good as any published work I've read. If you haven't read this, READ IT . I tell you this truthfully, this is the /best/ read I've had since Richard's Armageddon sent me reeling with smiles years ago.

I don't know where to start. The tea party between little Corrie and Athena is so incredibly perceptive for a guy to have written. And the final scene between Muffit and Boxey will leave you in tears. Each and every character's dialogue and responses are lovingly crafted to bring our beloved cast back to life. No detail was too small to overlook. From the uniqueness of the Colonial handshake to Laurette's innocently naughty, once socialator eye expression to Starbuck, it's all here. Suspense, laughs, disbelief at tyranny, heart swelling with joy at the dauntlessness of the human spirit. And surprise visits by the very best the TOS had to offer, which will most definitely leave you smiling ear to ear. There are moments of brilliant writing which will leave you saying exactly what I am thinking now, wow.

I wish so much this could become an authorized version of BSG and be in print where it belongs. I do not know if those licensed could authorize it, and I most timidly would ask if our beloved Richard were able, if he could do so with Dark Exodus, as an alternative storyline. I love Richard's writing and definitely, definitely want to see more; maybe I'm just thinking aloud, I would just love it so much if he or someone literarily licensed for BSG could help represent an authorized version of this (as an additional, alternative storyline). I'm certain it would be financially beneficial to all concerned. It takes the most risky and controversial possible future of BSG, and makes it shine.

Steve, you have done what millions of Hollywood dollars couldn't, make me believe that alternative BSG universes can and should exist. If there were ever a chance this could be the story made into a continuation, I am now convinced that every fan of every persuasion would feel that this would fill the void we've had inside for 25 years.

From a daggit that's waited one score years and five to see a scene as touching as Muffit and Boxey in Dark Exodus,

Affectionately,
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Old March 18th, 2004, 05:49 PM   #8
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This story is a TRUE TOS continueation thread. I hope that Martok continues
writing
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Old March 19th, 2004, 08:24 AM   #9
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I'd love to see the next one soon, Steve
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Old March 19th, 2004, 01:37 PM   #10
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Welcome again to CF Sharpe26!!!
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Old March 19th, 2004, 01:57 PM   #11
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Welcome back Sharpe!
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Old March 21st, 2004, 01:30 PM   #12
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one of the best good luck
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Old March 21st, 2004, 01:47 PM   #13
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Quote:
Originally Posted by launchcruiser7
one of the best good luck
I think so too launchcruiser.

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Old March 26th, 2004, 12:15 PM   #14
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Steve:

Your story was incredible! When I get a chance I have some questions but at least now that I finished I just wanted to thank you for the great work. I honestly believe this is the finest continuation concept I have read anywhere. You really brought the TOS characters to life. I actually think if this was made into a movie it would rival Saga of A Star World and Return of the Living Legend. I also liked your word descriptions. Someone who never saw TOS would have no problem seeing in their mind exactly what you described.

I'll write more later on your story but for now, "Thanks!"
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Old March 26th, 2004, 01:46 PM   #15
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Steve:
When I was reading fairly late in the story there is a part where President Krieger is thinking to himself and says something like if the cylons come back again that we will have some surprises for them. I thought at that time that this was foreshadowing that the Pegasus had already arrived or that the Earth people had a battlestar they found somewhere and now with the help of the colonials could operate. If President Krieger was not referring to the Pegasus what was he refering to?

Later when the Pegasus showed up in the heat of battle with the Hasari battlestars it seemed like no one knew they were there to include the colonials or President Krieger. Was the Pegasus there for some time and the information hidden from the public or did they actually show up when they appear for the first time in the story?

Was the Pegasus shadowing the cylon fleet the entire time or was her arrival at that particular time just lucky? It is hard for me to believe the Pegasus showed up when it did totally as a result of random coincidence.
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Old March 26th, 2004, 01:52 PM   #16
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Quote:
Originally Posted by antelope526
Steve:

Your story was incredible! When I get a chance I have some questions but at least now that I finished I just wanted to thank you for the great work. I honestly believe this is the finest continuation concept I have read anywhere. You really brought the TOS characters to life. I actually think if this was made into a movie it would rival Saga of A Star World and Return of the Living Legend. I also liked your word descriptions. Someone who never saw TOS would have no problem seeing in their mind exactly what you described.

I'll write more later on your story but for now, "Thanks!"
I agree with you 100% Antelope. Incredible story! Perfect for a continuation...


Now if we could just add some beavers to it...
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Old March 26th, 2004, 02:34 PM   #17
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Steve:
I liked the way you described the Hasari. They seemed pretty "elf" like. It kind of brings fantasy and sci fi full circle. Was that your intent, especially since I noticed a Lord of the Rings inspired call sign on one of the human fighter pilots (Legolas)?

I was not a big muffit fan in TOS but your use of the muffit and Boxey relationship in this story was very touching.

The way you wrote Athena was very interesting. You never gave her a new love. I think that would have been the easy way out but you explored what one feels when they lost their love and never found someone to replace him/her. The scenes between Starbuck and Athena were very touching. I think you did her justice in a way I don't think we will see if someone else makes a continuation. Great job!

You could really feel the burden of Apollo. You also didn't take the easy way out with Tigh. I was glad to see Tigh running the fleet as he rightly should have. He was the strong character we know he was. The transition to Apollo was well written and much better than proposed in some continuations where Apollo runs things from near moment one.

I don't know how I felt about the beings of light. As a TOS fan I kind of thought that was where you were going when the plane with President Kerieger's family was lost in a flash. Someone not familiar with TOS would not have wondered and maybe questioned why the beings of light were in the story.

Here's a thought if I could change one thing you wrote:

Boxey is taken by the beings of light. He then finds himself in white in his viper in an unknown area (Like Apollo vis a vis Terra). Nothing on his scanner is familiar. He then sees the "Galactica" in the distance and wonders what happened. As he approaches the "Galactica" he sees on the side the word "Pegasus". He lands in confusion. He is met by Commander Caine who says, "By the Lords of Kobol, who are you and how did you get here." Boxey responds,"I'm Boxey from the Battlestar Galactica and I don't know how I got here. What I do know is that the cylons are near Jupiter and I have to get back and warn the Galactica and Earth." Commander Caine says,"So Earth really does exist. Where is Earth? Let's see if we can give that old war daggit Adama a hand and destroy some of those gall mongering cylons. Lieutenant Boxey, can you help us plot a faster than light jump?"

Once again thanks! I look forward to your next effort.
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Old March 26th, 2004, 05:37 PM   #18
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Default SPOILERS...answering some good ???'s

Hello, Antelope and Muffit, and everyone,

Thank you so much for your kind words and praises about the story. I am honored when people say that it would be a worthy continuation...that's kinda what I had in mind when I wrote it. I wanted to bring this across as a genuine continuation, despite it being just a fanfic.

Muffit, thank you soooo much for your generous review of my story. I felt (with your review) as if I had done a professional job. I am so glad that everyone was able to visualize the story so vividly. I did try to strive to make the story as accessible as possible to anyone, regardless of whether or not they knew what Battlestar Galactica was. Thank you all so much.

Antelope, I will try to answer as many of your questions as possible. And thank you also for the very kind words.

SPOILER ALERT! SPOILER ALERT! SPOILER ALERT! Danger Will Robinson! Read no further if thou hast not read this story! SPOILER ALERT! SPOILER ALERT! SPOILER ALERT!

....

Did I mention a SPOILER ALERT?

Spoiler

ANTELOPE: "Steve:
When I was reading fairly late in the story there is a part where President Krieger is thinking to himself and says something like if the cylons come back again that we will have some surprises for them. I thought at that time that this was foreshadowing that the Pegasus had already arrived or that the Earth people had a battlestar they found somewhere and now with the help of the colonials could operate. If President Krieger was not referring to the Pegasus what was he refering to?"

STEVE: Antelope, if you remember early on in the story, when Commander Tigh is being given a video demo of some of the Earth's advanced tactical space tech, it included some experimental space planes designed for space combat maneuvers. However, they were still in the late, late prototypical stages...ready for trial runs, but not operationally ready. The surprise that Krieger mentions is that those space planes were now operationally ready...considering that the second Cylon wave came over a year after their initial assault on Earth.

ANTELOPE: "Later when the Pegasus showed up in the heat of battle with the Hasari battlestars it seemed like no one knew they were there to include the colonials or President Krieger. Was the Pegasus there for some time and the information hidden from the public or did they actually show up when they appear for the first time in the story?"

STEVE: No, the Pegasus had just arrived from deep space when the Cylons were deep into their second assault on Earth. Remember, Commander Cain explained that he had managed to get the Pegasus to a remote weapons outpost and foundry, to which they were able to make several production models of the Starhound II Class Viper (the ones with four laser cannons instead of two). Also, he went to the Hasari homeworld to call in a favor...considering that the Humans helped them out a thousand yahrens before.

ANTELOPE: "Was the Pegasus shadowing the cylon fleet the entire time or was her arrival at that particular time just lucky? It is hard for me to believe the Pegasus showed up when it did totally as a result of random coincidence."

STEVE: The Pegasus had just shown up in the nick of time during the second Cylon assault. It is generally assumed that the fleet commanders knew of the existence of Earth...Cain was just a little more certain. He wasn't shadowing the Cylons either, although he did have a few encounters with the Cylons enroute to Earth...and the Hasari were getting their combat legs during this journey. I thought it would make for more exciting prose if the Pegasus were to come out of the sun with guns blazing, and Vipers zapping.

ANTELOPE: "I liked the way you described the Hasari. They seemed pretty "elf" like. It kind of brings fantasy and sci fi full circle. Was that your intent, especially since I noticed a Lord of the Rings inspired call sign on one of the human fighter pilots (Legolas)? "

STEVE: Thanks on that. I did want the Hasari to be somewhat similar to humans, but to have something distinctly alien about them. I figured that the way I described them was to show how they had gone from a peace loving race to one forced to understand the ways of war...and I thought that a truly benign race would be characterized by gentle, almost graceful physical features. As for bringing sci-fi and fantasy full circle, thank you for those words. BSG is, after all, space fantasy, and although I wasn't really going for a kind of "elvin" motif with the Hasari, I think it's really cool that you saw them that way, and I take it as another compliment. As for "Legolas", I wanted a really cool call sign for a human pilot, and I wanted to tip my hat to "Lord Of the Rings" with that one. Did you notice some of the other tips o' the hat I gave to other sci-fi's? Star Wars and Star Trek?

ANTELOPE: "I don't know how I felt about the beings of light. As a TOS fan I kind of thought that was where you were going when the plane with President Kerieger's family was lost in a flash. Someone not familiar with TOS would not have wondered and maybe questioned why the beings of light were in the story."

STEVE: Ah, now this was definitely a part I wrote for the fans...probably one of the things that non-Galactica readers may or may not have been familiar with, but again, it was for the fans. I wrote it mostly for emotional impact. To have them revealed any sooner would've severely undermined the emotional impact at the end. Remember, Krieger had went through what he thought was a grave loss...as did Apollo and Athena. To have the families come back at the end was kinda my nod of the hat to "Close Encounters of the Third Kind". It also helped to explain why the Beings of Light will not appear in future stories. Their superiors had mandated that the BOL's not interfere in corporeal affairs. This was their way of trying to get back into their superiors' good graces. Plus, I wanted to throw in that additional punch with Apollo and Athena getting their message from Zac. Those were some nice ideas you had, Antelope, regarding the BOL's, but again, I wanted to go for the coup de grace at the end with some strong emotional impact. Thank you for your honesty on that part however. Sometimes I think it is a compliment when someone is unsure of their feelings at a certain part in the story.

To address some other parts you mentioned, Antelope, I thought that having Commander Tigh be in command, for at least the first half of the story was nothing short of logical. I wanted to continue portraying Apollo as the noble warrior he was, casting aside the potential trappings of nepotism which could have easily given him command. In this case, I wanted to stick to a strict chain of command. Tigh was clearly Apollo's senior, family lineage or no. I am glad you liked this approach. Besides, I wanted a fitting end for the venerable Tigh. I figured that Adama was a very long lived commander, but I thought it would advance my story, and put Apollo in command at the right time by having Adama be long since deceased. In truth, when I wrote this story, I envisioned it as a movie, keeping in mind the principal cast that was still alive today. Since Terry Carter is still alive and kicking quite well, I thought that it would be best to have him in commmand of the Galactica. It was actually very fun writing for Commander Tigh, especially in his moments of uncertainty...like addressing the fleet. I wanted to portray Commander Tigh as a very easy going officer, one whose beliefs had come even more full circle since assuming command of the fleet. I wanted to portray his sense of humor as his way of breaking his own ice when addressing large numbers of people...I never envisioned Tigh to be a natural public speaker.



Thank you for those questions, Antelope. Kinda felt like an interview. I hope I have answered your questions fully. Heck, mesa liken dis. If anyone else has any questions, as long as they do not jump into my upcoming sequel "Battlestar Galactica: Reciprocity", I will be happy to answer them. As with Antelope, please be sure to put "Spoiler" in your text, if the question mentions a specific scene in the story.

BTW, fans of Dark Exodus may be interested to know that I tried to further my story by contacting someone involved in a very important "post-production" aspect of Galactica. A select few of you know specifically whom I am talking about...but let's keep specifics on the down-low here. He did say that under very different circumstances, he would've been delighted to read my story, but for potential legal reasons, decided it was prudent not to have any connection to my story. So, a shot in the dark that fell short, but still, it was very much an honor to receive such a prompt, and nice reply from him.

Perhaps, if you fans of this story would like to see this taken further, maybe you could contact the higher ups of "Colonial Fan Force" and have them look over this story. Ya never know. Perhaps my contribution could be submitting a story that the fans may actually want to see up on the big screen. I know this might be a strange thing to ask, but hey, it's another shot in the dark. What do ya' think?

Respectfully, and with unending gratitude for your kind words and input,
Martok2112 (Steve Dunlap) ...aka General Chang
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Old March 28th, 2004, 02:04 PM   #19
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okay, so when will you post reciprocity?
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Old March 29th, 2004, 12:31 AM   #20
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Default When will I post "Reciprocity"?

Hello, Sharpe26.

Ack! A question about "Reciprocity"! Nayyyy! Noooo!

:laugh:

Well, I will need to get a TV adapter for my laptop so that I can get access to the information I have thus far on "Battlestar Galactica: Reciprocity". I was working on the treatment for the next story, when the "incident" occurred in Sioux Falls, SD, which crushed my laptop screen.

As soon as I get the adapter, I will be able to resume my work for the new story. Hopefully in a couple weeks. When I finish the treatment, I will start posting my story as soon as I get a few chapters written up. For now, we will all have to wait.

Thanks for the kind words about "Dark Exodus" and thank you all for your anticipation of the sequel. It will be posted asap. Good stories take time...and I don't want to botch a good story with a rushed tale.

Respectfully,
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Old March 29th, 2004, 12:03 PM   #21
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Thanks for answering my questions. It's pretty awesome we can talk to an actual author about their book on our happy little island.

I did notice your homage to Star Wars etc. I thought is was great. The joking around among the military personnel as they imitated Dark Vader was very funny and just the type of thing you would expect real people to do. It made the characters seem very true to life.
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Old June 14th, 2004, 08:57 AM   #22
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Default Well folks,

I have been sending Pete the chapters of the story. When he has them all...which may take a while...he will post them here.

If you haven't the patience to wait, you can go to my Yahoo group to read the chapters as they unfold.

http://groups.yahoo.com/group/BSGCon

Take care, and enjoy,
Martok2112
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Old July 4th, 2004, 03:16 AM   #23
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looks like i have some reading to do
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Old July 4th, 2004, 05:17 AM   #24
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Quote:
Originally Posted by martok2112
I have been sending Pete the chapters of the story. When he has them all...which may take a while...he will post them here.
The chapters that Steve has been sending are for the sequel, "Reciprocity".


Quote:
Originally Posted by Martok2112
If you haven't the patience to wait, you can go to my Yahoo group to read the chapters as they unfold.

http://groups.yahoo.com/group/BSGCon

Take care, and enjoy,
Martok2112
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Old August 14th, 2004, 11:48 AM   #25
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Just wanted to say...I have started to read Dark Exodus and it is terriffic! I have only just begun, but I love it. Steve you have a great writing style. It is so realistic and I can visualize everything! It is wonderful for me to read such a story...one my heart and soul has yearned for for so long...let you know more as I read......




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Old August 14th, 2004, 05:16 PM   #26
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Originally Posted by julix
Just wanted to say...I have started to read Dark Exodus and it is terriffic! I have only just begun, but I love it. Steve you have a great writing style. It is so realistic and I can visualize everything! It is wonderful for me to read such a story...one my heart and soul has yearned for for so long...let you know more as I read......





Thank you, Julix, and all. I hope you continue to enjoy the story.

All Appreciation,
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Old August 14th, 2004, 09:01 PM   #27
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Martok:

I just finished reading Dark Exodus and it is good (It would have to be for me to read it all at one sitting ) Between the continued byplay between Apollo and Starbuck and other story elements (don't want to give it away, who DOESN'T read spoilers!), I had to read it all!

Not very good at expressing myself, but Good Job
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Old August 15th, 2004, 12:46 AM   #28
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Default Thank you very much.

Thank you, very much, Archangel.

I am flatterred that you went through it in one sitting.

All these kind words again are making me chomp at the bit to get my A: Drive fixed so that I can resume work on the sequel "Battlestar Galactica: Reciprocity".

And as per Eric Paddon's sage advice to me, I do plan on offering up some brief explanations on the fates of certain characters in my story.

Speaking of which...if there is anyone here who has not read Eric Paddon's work on what he and his co-writers are doing...then you are missing out on some awe-inspiring material. They are literally creating a second season's worth of Battlestar Galactica stories that will leave you speechless. They are very character driven tales that capture the very essence of Galactica with great deftness. Also, they are adapting the original episodes with some extra goodies thrown in to smooth out certain plot points that may have been vague in the original show as aired. Check it out.

http://www.galacticafanfic.com/stories/season2.html

And of course, be sure to read the works of many other talented writers here in the Colonial Library.

With much appreciation to all of you,
Martok2112
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Old August 15th, 2004, 08:08 AM   #29
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Quote:
Originally Posted by martok2112
Thank you, very much, Archangel.

I am flatterred that you went through it in one sitting.

All these kind words again are making me chomp at the bit to get my A: Drive fixed so that I can resume work on the sequel "Battlestar Galactica: Reciprocity".

And as per Eric Paddon's sage advice to me, I do plan on offering up some brief explanations on the fates of certain characters in my story.

Speaking of which...if there is anyone here who has not read Eric Paddon's work on what he and his co-writers are doing...then you are missing out on some awe-inspiring material. They are literally creating a second season's worth of Battlestar Galactica stories that will leave you speechless. They are very character driven tales that capture the very essence of Galactica with great deftness. Also, they are adapting the original episodes with some extra goodies thrown in to smooth out certain plot points that may have been vague in the original show as aired. Check it out.

http://www.galacticafanfic.com/stories/season2.html

And of course, be sure to read the works of many other talented writers here in the Colonial Library.

With much appreciation to all of you,
Martok2112
Thanks for printing the link martok.

How ever that still doesn't answer my question .........WHEN are
you going to WRITE MORE?














I'm WAITING
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Old August 15th, 2004, 08:28 AM   #30
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Actually, Shiningstar,

I did answer your question in my last post.

Right now, the A: drive on my new (Read: pawn shop bought) computer is not functioning, and my notes and story thus far for "Reciprocity" are kept on floppy. Until I can get that to work again, I am unable to continue work on it.

And believe me....I want to continue on it.

Money is a little tight right now...as I only recently got re-employment, and hopefully another music gig will come along to augment the income I will get out of my new job...(Karaoke host). So, I need to get some money together to have my computer looked at. Hopefully, it will be soon, my friend.

Patience...for the Jedi it is time to eat as well.

Respectfully, and feelin' ya,
Martok2112
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